Hello world!

I owe a lot to the internet. In fact, if it weren’t for Facebook, I am inclined to believe, I would have at least two fewer “notches” on my proverbial belt. It’s amazing, really, what one can achieve when one finds oneself brave enough to take that small step further into the undiscovered country that lies somewhere beyond poking, but not quite at ringing someone up declaring your interest in them. “FACEBOOK- The poor man’s text message”. Sounds like a good publicity angle to me. I’m at the point where i don’t think i would have any friends, intimate or otherwise, if it were not for Facebook. I owe a lot to Facebook.

 That’s not to say it’s without its faults.

 Imagine if you will…a break up. Two people, relatively attractive with some social standing, wise enough to forego the almost inevitable “Mr Something and Little Miss Whatever are now in a relationship” having started off well end up where most relationships always do…that is arse over teacup. In the old days this wasn’t a problem. If you were of the sado-masochistic disposition you might attempt an effort along the lines of remaining friends with the newly departed. Futile. More likely you were inclined to do the manly courageous thing; that is, cut the other party out of your life, surrounding yourself with the friends you’ve, pretty much, ignored for the entirety of the failed relationship having replaced them with a single more attractive and less deppressing entity who most importantly is more likely than your friends to give you a blowjob. This being the only reason we ignore our friends when we are “in love” of course. Yes, these newly rediscovered friends would validate you once more. And, what’s more, shower you with vitriol concerning your past lover, that being what friends are for… of course.

Yes this is how it would go in the old days, before the dark times. Before the Facebook.

Now cutting someone out of your life is trickier. Taken that half of our life is now revolved around facebook that is. After all how comforting is it to be told by the dreaded “News Feed” that “your ex-girlfriend wrote on some dick heads wall”. Finding this out you inevitably look at what was said, we are after all creatures of punishment. And there it is. The proof. The proof that she has won. “Hey babe can’t wait to see you tonight”…or…”fancy dinner tomorrow” but most likely “MAN you’re bigger than my ex-boyfriend”. I mean no one needs that; no one needs to see that…

…i hate Facebook.